


trying to put it into words

by magisterequitum



Category: Psy-Changeling - Nalini Singh
Genre: F/M, Future Fic, Yuletide Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 14:09:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2814809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magisterequitum/pseuds/magisterequitum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Naya finds the box of jewelry on accident.</p>
            </blockquote>





	trying to put it into words

**Author's Note:**

  * For [empressearwig](https://archiveofourown.org/users/empressearwig/gifts).



> Happy Yuletide!!! I hope it is wonderful for you. <3

Naya finds the box of jewelry on accident. 

Truly she does. She's not naturally prone to snooping unlike the stereotypes about cats and leopard changelings. She doesn't go looking for it. It just happens. 

Her hand smacks against the box when she's trying to find an old anatomy textbook she thinks she stored away in the closet. She's not scheduled in rotation today and has exams to study for. 

The New York apartment isn't very large. She, and now Julian since he practically gave up living in that rented hotel room, cram their things in the few storage spaces they have. Most of the stuff gets forgotten. Until now like when she needs this book for her studies. 

The collision sends the box skidding off the shelf over her head. Tipping end over, it crashes to the floor. 

Even as Naya bends down to pick it up, she doesn't mean to snoop. Her intention is to put it back and find her main goal. 

Instead, her fingers catch on the lid and the contents spill out as a result. She freezes, pads of her fingers feeling smooth edges of what she thinks are stones. Rocks. Gems. Lifting up one of the items to her eyesight, she can see now it's a necklace. 

Green beads that match the color of her eyes. Beads that are smoother, more polished, nicer than the ones that rest frayed and worn around her wrist. 

Her breath catches. 

A necklace. 

_A present_ , her panther purrs. _A present made for her._

Inhaling sharply, Naya drops it back into the box. Palms slapping against the sides, she stuffs all of the spilled contents back in, trying to get the lid down. She succeeds. However, not before she sees that the box doesn't just have one piece of jewelry in it. There are others, many others. Some more of the quality like the child's bracelet, that had once been worn as a necklace, but others that are far finer and nicer. 

She slams the lid shut and stands to shove all of it back into the closet.

The anatomy textbook is forgotten. 

 

 

 

Naya might be dating, involved, whatever classification she is with Julian, but it's his twin brother that she turns to. Not because she's currently freaking out. Not that at all; though she is, whatever. No, she turns to Roman because he's her bestfriend. 

As children, Roman and Naya had stuck together more often than not. The Ryder twins had been infamous amongst the Pack as troublemakers, but being both gentler in nature, Roman and she had paired off as closest of friends. 

When she manages to get Roman on the video-comm, he lets her get through two sentences before scrunching his face up and scoffing. Making a noise from the back of his throat, he speaks so loud that the speakers crackle, "No, absolutely not. Rule number one." 

Nose wrinkling, Naya huffs. She taps her fingers on the coffee table where she's set the screen up. "But this is an emergency."

Roman's face is fuller than his twins. Only noticeable once you spend enough time staring at both. Also noticeable when you spend all your time with one because you're _whatever_ with them. "Rule number one: no talking about sexing my brother or my best friend."

Rule number one had been laid out months ago and applied to both Naya and Julian in regards to asking Roman for advice. 

"I found a box," Naya says, ignoring his recitation. It is an emergency. Her panther's purring inside of her, pleased at their accidental discovery. The Psy part of her has her brain running through too many scenarios and thoughts. 

Instead of protesting again, Roman pauses. She's known him long enough to be able to read his face. To know that the expression in his green eyes, darker than her own, is that he knows something. 

"What? What is it? You know something already." 

The video-comm goes out of focus for a moment. The signal sometimes isn't the best here in the apartment. But then it settles and Roman's staring at her, jaw working in a way that tells her he's grinding his teeth. "Maybe."

"What do you-"

"Maybe because I sent him the box in the first place and it's full of pieces he's made for years," he says it all in a rush while he looks upward too. Refusing to look at her face. The ceiling more fascinating than her.

That terrible pause again where her throat catches, her heart skips painfully, and her lungs have to remind her to breathe. Her panther rakes its claws against her internally, purring even louder. So very pleased at guessing. 

"They're for me?" Naya finally makes herself ask, tongue thick. 

Roman waves his hands, shaking his head. "I'm not saying anymore. Go talk to my brother yourself. And don't call me back." 

He cuts the connection before she can ask him anything else. 

 

 

 

While Julian is a full soldier by DarkRiver Pack considerations, here in New York City he doesn't really fulfill any of those duties. Naya jokes often that he's simply her live in boy toy while she finishes her clinical studies. He's good at math, and so he helps with Pack business; something involving math and economics that she'd rather not know.

What it means is that he's not home. 

Which means she has time to try and plan something out. She's good at plans. It's what makes her so attuned to being a healer. She's practical and organized. She likes lists. Her father always says she gets it from her mother. Grandma says she gets it from her. 

Naya has options. 

She can ignore the fact that she found the box and its contents entirely. Never speak of it again. Roman certainly wouldn't, though he'll judge her later. 

She can wait for Julian to bring it up. Hope that it's sooner rather than later. Drop hints till he gets it and brings it up himself.

Or she can bring it up herself. Just say, _hey today I found what looks like a bunch of jewelry you've made for me and are keeping in a box, so what's up with that?_

Truthfully, part of her likes option one. 

Her panther hates it, growling in displeasure.

 

 

 

The truth is part of option one appeals to her because Julian and she are _whatever_. That's just it. They're not mated. The dance has only just started to show up between them. 

She loves him, wants him, and she knows he does too. They'd gone through enough to get to here, living together, that she knows. 

But they've very much not talked about the fact the mating bond hasn't come together. 

It could mean nothing. Plenty of changeling couples, even mixed couples like them, sometimes date for long periods of time before the dance changes over. Instant mates are rare and few. 

Her panther doesn't care; the animal side of her finds her concerns to be laughable. 

She's not just changeling though. 

 

 

 

In the end, option number three is what happens because as soon as Julian comes home, Naya says it. 

She manages to last while he sets dinner down. Takeout from the place around the corner that smells great, nearly distracting her. But when he leans down to kiss her hello on the couch, cold fingers cupping her face, it comes out:

"I found something in the closet today." 

Julian blinks, thumbs stroking her cheeks, a tiny crease forming between his eyebrows. "Something?" 

Inhaling through her nose, Naya exhales and licks her lips. She looks up into eyes familiar to her, notes the tiny smile at the corner of his mouth where she loves to kiss him so much. "A box."

Comprehension seeps in, that tiny smile slipping and fading till his mouth goes slack. The fingers on her face stop their stroking. 

She swallows, "A box with certain things inside it." 

"I see," is all he says in reply, and his hands fall away from her head. He leaves her there on the couch, turning and disappearing back towards the front door. 

Groaning, she hangs her head till she's looking at her knees. She can hear him rustling in the closet. Stupid is what she is. Forcing him into revealing this. Male changelings can be so prickly. She should have left it as is. "It was an accident," she starts to say. "I didn't go looking for it. I knocked it over and I was just putting it all back when-"

" _Nadiya,_ "

Her full name and she jerks up, spine straightening and head rising. Few people say her full name ever, and no one says it like Julian does. Low with the syllables just right. She shivers, and says lowly, "That's not fair." 

Julian grins, the box in his hands, and walks towards her. He's so much taller than her anyway, but now standing and she sitting she's just reminded that he's a soldier. Dominant to her much more submissive nature. Which has never been a negative issue between them. 

"You worry too much," he says, sitting next to her, leg pressing into hers. He reaches forward and kisses her quickly. "I don't care that you found it." 

That makes her eyebrows rise. "Really? Then why was it in the closet?"

His eyes flash, the green turning bright gold, his leopard pressing forward for a moment. Then, he shakes his head, dark hair settling across his forehead. "I didn't want to push you." 

She shifts closer to him, her panther wanting to touch. "Push me?" 

"Naya, I love you," and the statement's made so seriously, still and quietly. 

"I love you too," an automatic response but nonetheless true. 

The gold takes over again, a brilliant luminescent sheen. "No," he says, "It's always been you. Even when I didn't know or understand it. As kids, later, after you left, now. Just _you_."

Confusion must show on her face because he opens the box and starts lifting pieces out. The one she'd picked off the floor earlier, it's similarity to the one on her wrist. The one he'd made her. Then another, but now with beads made from tinted glass. Others with intricate metalwork, bent in swirls and so artistically done. One with emeralds, the finest piece. 

Julian pulls them out one by one and lines then up on his jean covered thigh. Till they're all there before her gaze. She can't look away from them, even if she can feel him watching her.

'You made them," Naya's voice is barely above a whisper. 

He nods, a short movement she sees from above her eyesight. "For you. Just like the one here," he reaches for her bracelet covered wrist, fingers sliding across the tiny plastic beads. "I didn't know they were for you. My leopard did. Roman did. He figured it out before me. Told me I was an idiot." 

Her panther stretches right underneath her skin, so very happy. He made them while thinking of her. These are courting gifts, presents for her, even if they've been kept in a box. Even if he's gone about it backwards. 

Throat thick for a different reason now, she finally looks up and kisses him. Her lips press firm against his, a deeper kiss than his quick one from earlier. "You're not an idiot," she tells him when she pulls back. 

"Maybe a little." Against her mouth, but he's kissing her, forgetting the box to cup her face again. 

The jewelry falls to the floor, various tinkling and clattering noises, as she climbs into his lap. They're forgotten for the moment. Both are far more eager in reaching bare skin and falling onto the couch over one another. 

 

 

 

Later, as Naya watches Julian put the takeout in the oven to heat up, she fingers the emerald necklace now around her neck. He'd put it on her after they'd had sex on the couch. Kissing her collarbone, he'd left her for sweatpants and to heat their dinner up. 

Now she wears his shirt, toes curling underneath her bent legs, and appreciates the view of his bare shoulders before he turns and walks back to join her again. 

"Thank you," she says when he rejoins her, curling up into his side, head on his shoulder. 

He makes a rumbling noise against her hair. His hand settles on her thigh, warm on her skin. "For what?" 

"For letting me worry." She kisses his chest, pressing her teeth into his skin and grinning at the deeper growl she gets in response. "For loving me." 

_For wanting me and making me these._

"Always," is his answer. 

Her panther grins in an _I told you so_ manner.


End file.
